Pressure to be a good Parent
Views from the Sanity nanny!
A new report from the Institute of Fiscal Studies has declared that summer born babies are likely to be at a disadvantage. I believe this this is true for some children.
Firstly the advantages and disadvantages are more pronounced when a child is older. Whilst every child is different and develops at a different rate, if you have a shy or a child lacking in confidence there is often a marked difference at school. Essentially if an August baby goes to school and is graded against a September baby there is virtually a whole years learning between them. When children are being assessed for abilities or exams, teachers particularly new or inexperienced ones often fail to understand this. They simply use “standard league tables” which do not allow for this. There is a big difference in maturity between a child aged just 4 and a child about to be 5 particularly if you are talking about boys. Girls are around 6 months ahead of boys as a general rule (fact) so there are additional factors involved.
A much fairer way of assessing children would be to do it half yearly or even quarterly but of course this would lead to more work for teachers…..! Our education system lets a lot of kids down who don’t ‘fit in’ to the standard system, that is why Montessori Education which is more child centred and allows a child to progress at their own rate leads to happy, independent and successful children.
Another factor to consider is your child’s personality confident children will always do well. I personally think that a child’s happiness comes first, regardless of grades. If they are always comparing themselves as young children do with their friends, they often (wrongly) feel a’ failure’ or ‘not good enough’ which is really sad and one of the reasons I do the work I do.
When children get the right messages from an early age it doesn’t matter how bright they are or not, it simply means you are doing a great job as a parent and they will grow up being confident and believing in themselves.
As a rule children, are a reflection of their parents, sometimes there are personality clashes which can be difficult for parents to deal with…..oops another obstacle! It’s all very complex and exhausting, no wonder parents get confused about who and what to believe about their abilities and their childâ€™s welfare!
Follow your heart and wait for your child to tell you they love you, you then know you are doing something right!